Monday, May 24, 2010

Looking out the windshield

May 24, 2010: Exactly one month after Oklahoma City Memorial Marathon.

May 24, 2010: Day one of Chicago Marathon training.

I have about 20 weeks, or exactly 138 days to get ready to kill Chicago.

Chicago is extremely important for me. Not because I'm going to try to qualify for Boston. I'm still a few years away from that goal. But it's because mentally and physically, I want to prove to myself I can become a better runner and live up to my full potential. I want to erase the yuck of Oklahoma City from my mind completely.

Don't get me wrong, the disappointment from OKC is getting better. Last Friday, I actually opened the email from OKC with my finisher's certificate. And for the first time, looking at my results, I wasn't mortified. I finished smack in the middle of my age group, 72/155. And out of all females, 405/1060. I'm ok with that.

Someone dear to my heart told me, "You need to stop looking out the rear view mirror and out the windshield. Eyes on the prize."

Boy, I'm really good at that. Replaying everything over and over again in my head. What if? What if? What if?

But at some point you just get flat out tired of flogging yourself. I reached that point.

Yeah, I know I said that I was moving on in my last blog. But really, this time I am. I'm focusing on the plan. I'm not going to be racing through my training like I did last time. I'm doing things smarter, with a lot of help from my coach and my friends.

I'm done looking through the rear view mirror worrying about a wreck. I'm looking out the windshield and enjoying the view along the way.

6 comments:

  1. I love it! You are an amazing person and an awesome runner. There is no reason to be critical of yourself when just finishing the marathon is an accomplishment. And your positive attitude will make training more fun and produce better results.

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  2. Cant wait to keep up with each other's training! Its going to be a great experience!

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  3. Beat this into your head Suann: "I will not go out too fast at Chicago."

    Live it. Breathe it. And then you *will* exceed your expectations in the Windy City.

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  4. You're going to KILL Chicago (even if "KILL" means just finishing)!!! You are an awesome person and a great runner, no matter what your time(s) may reflect in your own mind. You put-in the time and milage and that takes dedication and commitment. The dedication and commitment is what makes you great! I hope you enjoy the view and have a great ride!

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  5. Good for you! What a great read for me, because I'm dwelling over the "disaster" of my 1st half at the moment, though it wasn't really that bad.
    I'm stoked to read about your training this summer, because I'll be training for the same race!

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